Why You Should Not Let Go of the Past
“You should let go of the past. It won’t do you any good.”
People around me always say this. Well, yes. I agreed. I also thought it was the right thing to do. It has been proven numerous times and by real people.
I have read various online articles and real-life essays of people who have achieved genuine happiness through forgetting and moving on. I thought this is fantastic.
One of my lonesome days in the city, I sat down and told myself:
Dear self,
Forget about the pains and heartaches you’ve been through. You deserve real happiness in life like the people you’ve read about. How do you do this? Simply take them out of your mind and throw them away into the big blue trash bin outside your apartment. It’s as simple as that.
It is only then you will be able to experience your life in a different light. You’re going to see the most beautiful things in the world like you never did before. You’re going to achieve great things — far greater than anybody else will ever do.
Let go of the past and shine brighter!
This became my mantra ever since the day I decided to let go of the past: “let go of the past and shine brighter.”
You. Place your fist on your heart. Say it with me. “Let go of the past and shine brighter.”
I did felt better. I was able to become more productive. I found happiness in the simplest joys of life: meeting new friends, obtaining another degree, getting that Mac I always wanted, becoming a professor, being admired by my students, shopping for notebooks and pens, becoming a fanatic of and spending lots of money for KPOP, and so many others.
These things did make me happy. I never questioned what kind of happy, though. I was enjoying the material things I can get. I was overjoyed by the superficial connections I had with people (not with everyone, of course). I was living for the reactions of people in social media which I believed has validated my victory in life.
I post everything I do. I post about the people I have. I talk about intellectual things because that’s supposed to make me look more amazing. I go back to my hometown for vacations and low-key boast about what I’ve become.
I was able to do all these because I let go of my past. I did not dwell on what has happened in the past and just lived for today.
That was my mantra: “Let go of the past and shine brighter.”
However, I face the empty ceiling every night. I kept thinking what I should do the following day. How can I please my friends on Facebook? How can I boast about my accomplishments? How can I look more cool in front of my so-called friends? What should I spend money on next to make me look more successful?
I have become a mess.
By forgetting my believed-to-be insignificant past, I became a person who solely dwelt on the present. By ignoring what my life was before, I became a person who have forgotten to think things through, to make plans, to be prepared. I thought I was too amazing; I need not do preparations.
Today, there were so many thoughts in my head. Numerous short-lived events that happened — they happened so fast I do not know which came before another. My brain could not fathom which one to focus on first. I panicked mentally. I could not do anything about the thoughts. I can’t control what’s happening.
After hours of lying down, I thought maybe a fresh perspective could make me think better. So, I went to a nearby coffee shop and spend hours there re-thinking things. I also went shopping for pretty gifts for my friends. For a short while, I have forgotten what I was worried about.
Again. Like a song on repeat, I did it again. I forgot about it all and shined brighter by enjoying the nicest things in life in that shopping mall. This is =
After several times of deep psycho conversations with myself, I decided that ‘that’ is wrong. It is a mistake to believe that the past is insignificant. It is definitely significant.
